Forgiveness and Lying

Turn on media, be it TV, Facebook or radio and everyone has an opinion on the Brian Williams issue. Statements I have heard are "he is the only one being punished for lying about the Iraq war." I find this logic troubling. When dealing with Mr. Williams we have to focus on the type of position he has, on the ethical expectations and requirements of his position. At this time we are not dealing with an elected official or any other professional. I assume that professional journalists are not amused or take this lightly since this affects the entire profession. While Mr. Williams has lied I think it's important to address what led to him lying. There are, I am sure, underlining issues that were present and may still be present which caused him, and causes others to do what he did. I actually saw a clip of the interview and it's interesting to see how he just went on and on embellishing the story. Of interest is Mr. Williams obvious good looks and it will be interesting to see what happens. He truly does not fit the stereotypical liar prototype, whatever that is for most people. Most people have prejudices of what a liar or "bad" guy may look like and Mr. Williams' features and "looks" are not what most people typically think of as "bad"or "liar." I will guess that we will be hearing more as time passes and that this will affect the way people perceive journalism and the media in general. All issues of lying are to be taken seriously. It is not appropriate behavior especially for professionals in esteemed positions. We need to trust and we need to trust professionals, all professionals. If people believe that more people need to be given consequences for inappropriate behavior or actions during and about Iraq then they should start grassroots groups and work toward change. We can not just let someone lie and let it be okay. Regarding the future, we can forgive Mr. Williams but he needs to do some personal work to correct any personal issues that he may have which prompted him to lie. We need to help Mr. Williams confront his demons. It will ultimately help him and even make him a better journalist and human being.

It's Important to tell the truth

It goes with out saying that one should not lie, but people do. Why? There are actually numerous reasons but people lie, usually, to avoid consequence or punishment. It is truly destructive to any relationship when there are lies. One's first question is, what have they lied about before? Suddenly, everything they have done or said is looked at through a different filter. I am obviously talking about lies as in not telling the truth. What triggered my thinking is this issue about Brian Williams, the television anchor. He apparently lied about being in a helicopter in Iraq that was fired at and that needed to land. Why, oh why, did he do that? I do not know him and can not answer the question. For some reason he made the story up. Perhaps he needed attention? It's not clear. Now there are other lies. The lies of deception and cheating. These can occur in any partnership including romantic, marital and even business. For some reason, be it childhood traumas or others, people cheat, steal and ultimately hurt other people. For the "victim" it becomes very challenging to trust others and it's not uncommon to see them unable to form healthy relationships for several years if ever. As I have written before, no person is an island and we influence and affect others by our actions. Many times the "hurter" may have suffered a childhood trauma. Perhaps there was abandonment, or they may have witnessed the same actions done by one parent to the other. I see people cheat on their spouses through the life span. I have had senior citizens that have cheated and have "stolen" the couples life savings. I say stolen because these marital assets belong to both and one person decides to take it all and sometimes even disappear. There some people that even give their lovers money. Again, these people that act poorly have low self-esteem because do you really need to pay people to be with you? I will say that for the senior citizens there was prior cheating in most cases. Again, the lying needs to stop but in some cases it never does because lies are created to cover up the initial lies. I have met with people who just can't stop lying and the longer they do this the worse the consequences are. For many people, the fear of consequences is great and they fail to see that it is only making the situation worse. People who have noticed a pattern of lying need to look back and explore how they started. What was the pattern of communication at home? Were they punished severely for lying and then admitting it? Once you have explored the origin then you can start on changing the behavior. Thinking before you speak so that you give yourself time to not immediately just tell a lie. Lying is the worst poison you can use to totally ruin a reputation or a relationship. Lying is not acceptable and no good will come of it.